Thanksgiving will be here in 9 days.
The full court press for Christmas begins the day after Thanksgiving. Christmas music on the radio, in stores, elevators. Christmas decorations. Christmas shopping and the daily reminder of exactly how many days are left until Christmas.
My annual bout of Christmas dread has begun. I’m feeling my usual need to hide in the closet (with a blanket and a bottle of something ) until it is all over.
For years family and friends have joked about my holiday feelings. Each year I change my Facebook profile picture to that of The Grinch.
Though I always manage to decorate, shop and smile through the weeks between Thanksgiving and Christmas, the rare years that my children and grandchildren are here to celebrate with us are the only times I don’t have to fake it.
This is what I am. A cheer faker. A Christmas counterfeiter. A Ho-Ho-Humbug.
I watch in awe and envy of those who do Christmas with excitement and perfection. I marvel as they decorate, shopping for the perfect gifts, wrapping packages in coordinating wraps and ribbons. I appreciate the sincerity and happiness those people feel. Some are celebrating the true meaning of Christmas and others just the general goodness of the season.
What is my problem? Do I have a problem? Why do I do this to myself every year? I get caught up in the expectations of the season and I always find myself lacking.
Each year I tell myself that the next Christmas season will be different. I tell myself I’ll decorate, I’ll sing, I’ll wrap all the gifts in homemade hand painted papers with origami name tags.
Each year the season sneaks up on me and I realize I have no time or real interest in making it anything but what it is for me ( and I don’t know how to make origami name tags).
So, my Grinch hat is off to those of you who love the season and do it well.
I’ll watch and live vicariously.
Meanwhile, if anyone needs me, I’ll be in the closet with my blanket and a bottle of something
PS – You’re all getting gift cards which will come in plain white envelopes. If I can find a red pen I’ll write your name in a festive font.