It is that time of year again.
It gets dark earlier and stays dark longer. The days are gray , the sun struggles to shine.
My body tells me it just wants to eat and sleep.
This would be great if I were a bear.
I don’t have the luxury of hibernation. I have to get up every morning and go to work.
SAD or Seasonal Affective Disorder most often starts in October or November and ends in March or April . In my first draft I included a long and bo-ring explanation of SAD but who wants to read that? I’m pretty everyone knows how to google.
I’ll just list some symptoms:
- daytime fatigue
- difficulty concentrating
- feelings of hopelessness
- increased irritability
- lack of interest in social activities
- weight gain
Right now some of you are saying “well this isn’t going to be funny, why the heck am I still reading?”.
I dunno but try to hang in for a minute unless you also have SAD and your ability to concentrate ended in paragraph two.
I don’t have all those listed symptoms but I do have the following:
- daytime fatigue– My brain shuts off at 3 pm. I can be in the middle of a sentence. In a meeting. With smart people. ” What we see trending now is (the clock strikes three)……..um…….boobles shubidue chickles. “
- difficulty concentrating– ?
- increased irritability– WHAT? I couldn’t concentrate enough to write anything about concentrating dammit.
- lethargy– I’m not sure why this wouldn’t fall under the same category as daytime fatigue. Apparently the symptom lister people just wanted to make it look like there were more symptoms than there are. As if we need more symptoms! A**holes. (see increased irritability above)
- weight gain– My body believes it is a bear. My bear body ( not to be confused with bare body because that one thinks we need to go to the damn gym) thinks it should put on a winter layer of fat to sustain itself until spring. This is where donuts come in. Donuts also make me happy which helps with the increased irritability until I can’t zip up my jeans and then the cycle starts all over again.
So the fight begins. I’m stepping up the Vitamin D and getting out the light box. I’m reloading my Dunkin Donuts prepaid card so I can drive through twice a day if necessary.
As my main symptom seems to be increased irritability, I will apologize in advance to anyone whose head I bite off in the coming months.
Remember if we run into each other on the street, it is best to approach slowly and offer the bear a donut. This will put her in a good mood and give her a 30 second focus.
Then turn and run like hell before she finishes eating .